Change just never quits coming

It seems like ever since I started this blog my life has been one great roller-coaster of happiness and pain. True - that is generally what life is - pain and sorrow all wrapped up together. And this is not necessarily a bad thing, either. That's just the way God allows life to be.

When I originally started blogging I had just broken up with my first boyfriend. I was in the "Be still and know" stage of my life. Trying to piece things together and seek God first. Since then I have dated again, been broken up with, quit school, started a good (but stressful) job, and quit that as well.

In between all that I traveled with a school music group, attended the funeral of my much-loved Grandpa, and spent my first Christmas away from my family. Now, once again, change is in the air.

I have moved home for the summer...

Being so far away from family is difficult. I am slowly learning that all the friends and fun activities in the world don't fill the hole in my heart that family does. After Grandpa died last summer, I realized that just because I had a good job and fun times didn't mean I had a full life.

And this is the other thing I learned - while a job is a necessary thing, there is no reason to dread work every day. One should do his/her best to find a position that fits them. My position didn't. I was stressed and tired and worried all the time. I realized I would prefer a job with poorer benefits than have a job that haunted me at night.

Saying all this does not mean that I will live at home with my parents for the rest of my life. No, not at all. I am going back to school to finish my teaching degree. I am not sure that I really want to teach, but I see the degree as a means to an end. Much can be done with an education degree, especially one in Secondary English/Lit! I may pursue counseling, youth work, working with books/writing. I don't know for sure where I am going, but at least I know (kinda) which path I am taking. :)

So I will be attending another Christian college this fall to attain that degree. As far as the summer goes, I am not sure what I am doing. I have a cleaning job, some fill-in work at the eye dr's office, and a few other odd jobs. I will be (hopefully) spending some quality time with my Grandma, and am hoping and praying that I can make it to Pennsylvania to be in the wedding of one of my dear friends. I am also hoping and praying that I can pick up one or two more odd jobs (cleaning, yard work, etc) just to make enough money so that things not quite so tight this summer.

You can help me pray about that for sure!

All in all, I feel a little like a deer caught in the headlights. What should I do? Which way should I go? And how on earth am I going to get there?! I am not sure, but I do know that God is walking with me. I have peace that I am in His will for the moment and I know He will continue to lead me.