Check out this awesome giveaway! :)
KRISTINA J.: Two Birthdays and a Great, Big Giveaway: (ASOS Maxi skirt , Target Merona Chambray shirt , Nine West wedges , Vintage bag) This is a huge weekend for me...I'm...
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Sunday, July 24, 2011
He loves me
The most life-changing concept I have ever known is as simple as the title of this post. But the question is who? Whose love could be this life-changing? Whose love could make me walk with a new confidence...life in my veins? What love can give joy in darkness and peace in hopeless times?
Truly it is the love of my Heavenly Father that is making this difference in my life. For so long I felt that God must not be very nice. He loved me...but He didn't really care about me or my feelings. I truly believed that He didn't care if I was happy as long as I was holy.
Who wants to love a God like that?
I didn't. Oh - I wanted to serve Him because I knew I should. I wanted to serve Him because I wanted freedom from my past and my sin and my fear. But I didn't understand that I could enjoy my relationship with Him. I did not see that walking with Him did not have to be a miserable daily choice to trust an unkind deity.
What has changed? Without sounding sacrilegious, I believe that my God has changed. I now serve a God of love and hope - His mercies are new every morning - this is the God of Scripture. Oh, it isn't that God never demands justice or punishes sin. It is not that He is very soft and will never allow bad things to happen to me. No, the truth is that He loves me. And that is enough.
Walking with Him is about allowing Him to come into my heart and so fill me with Himself that I am changed into His likeness. Once again, I used to think it was about beating myself into submission...making myself more pleasing to Him. I now am vaguely catching a glimpse that I am most pleasing to Jesus when I am yielding myself (made whole by His love) to Him. It is then that He can fill me and make my life whole and beautiful and fulfilled.
I see that it is no longer about hating myself...tamping down me and becoming someone else. It is no longer about presenting the perfect face to society and gaining their love. God loves me the same...no more and no less...even if I have just stumbled and fallen. I believe He delights when I come back to Him and admit that I cannot make it on my own.
And so, whoever may read this, may I remind you that Jesus loves you. It is not about who you are, how you look, whether you have gained a bit of weight, that last decision you made that didn't turn out quite right, whether you feel like everyone is against you. It is about Him...and you. He loves you. He longs for you to realize that if you have given Him your heart, you are His beloved child.
Will you walk with Him and let Him love you? I think He is longing to surround you with love...because, to be honest, He is love. And once you accept that fact, things will never be the same. In a good way.
"Jesus loves me this I know.
For the Bible tells me so."
Truly it is the love of my Heavenly Father that is making this difference in my life. For so long I felt that God must not be very nice. He loved me...but He didn't really care about me or my feelings. I truly believed that He didn't care if I was happy as long as I was holy.
Who wants to love a God like that?
I didn't. Oh - I wanted to serve Him because I knew I should. I wanted to serve Him because I wanted freedom from my past and my sin and my fear. But I didn't understand that I could enjoy my relationship with Him. I did not see that walking with Him did not have to be a miserable daily choice to trust an unkind deity.
What has changed? Without sounding sacrilegious, I believe that my God has changed. I now serve a God of love and hope - His mercies are new every morning - this is the God of Scripture. Oh, it isn't that God never demands justice or punishes sin. It is not that He is very soft and will never allow bad things to happen to me. No, the truth is that He loves me. And that is enough.
Walking with Him is about allowing Him to come into my heart and so fill me with Himself that I am changed into His likeness. Once again, I used to think it was about beating myself into submission...making myself more pleasing to Him. I now am vaguely catching a glimpse that I am most pleasing to Jesus when I am yielding myself (made whole by His love) to Him. It is then that He can fill me and make my life whole and beautiful and fulfilled.
I see that it is no longer about hating myself...tamping down me and becoming someone else. It is no longer about presenting the perfect face to society and gaining their love. God loves me the same...no more and no less...even if I have just stumbled and fallen. I believe He delights when I come back to Him and admit that I cannot make it on my own.
And so, whoever may read this, may I remind you that Jesus loves you. It is not about who you are, how you look, whether you have gained a bit of weight, that last decision you made that didn't turn out quite right, whether you feel like everyone is against you. It is about Him...and you. He loves you. He longs for you to realize that if you have given Him your heart, you are His beloved child.
Will you walk with Him and let Him love you? I think He is longing to surround you with love...because, to be honest, He is love. And once you accept that fact, things will never be the same. In a good way.
"Jesus loves me this I know.
For the Bible tells me so."
Monday, July 18, 2011
Hanging in There?
Ever heard someone say, "Oh, I am just hanging in there."? It seems like there is supposed to be something good about "just holding on." Like one should receive some credit for hanging on desperately, despairingly and hopelessly.
I suppose from one point of view that is true. I mean, we are supposed to reap if we faint not, right?
It took several conversations, however, for me to see that "hanging on for dear life" is not necessarily always a good thing. Why did it take me so long to realize that maybe I need to let go - let go of my dreams, let go of my fears? I am pretty sure that my plans, my wishes, my pain is not what is going to bring glory to God.
In 2 Corinthians Paul talks about the "thorn" in his flesh. This was something that he had earnestly entreated God to have removed from his life. There are many speculations about what the thorn was, but I think that is a point that doesn't need explained. What mattered is that when Paul was weak...that was when he was the strongest in God's eyes.
See, God wants us to come before Him open-handed. I think there are two reasons for this. First, we need to come to God and let go of everything - our plans, our fears, our...you get the point. We need to let go of ourselves. And then? Then, while our hands are still open, then our Heavenly Father is able to fill us - fill our lives with strength and peace. I think (or am learning to think, thanks to some wise people in my life) that when we are being honest about our weakness (and letting go) before God is when He is able to do the most with us. Allowing Him to be strong for us...that is true strength.
Know what I think? Next time I feel like I am just barely hanging on I think I need to remind myself to let go. Let go of the masks and the pretenses, let go of the fear, let go of controlling the situation, let go of what I think I need...and let myself be weak. For "when I am weak, then I am strong." (1 Cor. 12.10) And I don't think that will be so bad, for then I am reminded that "underneath are the everlasting arms." (Deut. 33:27)
I suppose from one point of view that is true. I mean, we are supposed to reap if we faint not, right?
It took several conversations, however, for me to see that "hanging on for dear life" is not necessarily always a good thing. Why did it take me so long to realize that maybe I need to let go - let go of my dreams, let go of my fears? I am pretty sure that my plans, my wishes, my pain is not what is going to bring glory to God.
In 2 Corinthians Paul talks about the "thorn" in his flesh. This was something that he had earnestly entreated God to have removed from his life. There are many speculations about what the thorn was, but I think that is a point that doesn't need explained. What mattered is that when Paul was weak...that was when he was the strongest in God's eyes.
See, God wants us to come before Him open-handed. I think there are two reasons for this. First, we need to come to God and let go of everything - our plans, our fears, our...you get the point. We need to let go of ourselves. And then? Then, while our hands are still open, then our Heavenly Father is able to fill us - fill our lives with strength and peace. I think (or am learning to think, thanks to some wise people in my life) that when we are being honest about our weakness (and letting go) before God is when He is able to do the most with us. Allowing Him to be strong for us...that is true strength.
Know what I think? Next time I feel like I am just barely hanging on I think I need to remind myself to let go. Let go of the masks and the pretenses, let go of the fear, let go of controlling the situation, let go of what I think I need...and let myself be weak. For "when I am weak, then I am strong." (1 Cor. 12.10) And I don't think that will be so bad, for then I am reminded that "underneath are the everlasting arms." (Deut. 33:27)
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Just grateful
Over the past few months I have been realizing more and more that a part of trust is accepting the grace that is given to me by a benevolent Father's hand. In acceptance is found joy...and it seems to me that joy and gratitude are inseparable.
So today, even though I am struggling with fear of the unknown, I pause to count blessings - to accept with joy the "God-moments" that have been given to me. I realize now that truly "every good and perfect gift come from above - from the Father of light with whom there is no variableness." This does not mean that only the big blessings come from God as gifts of grace. No, far from it. The little things that I often forget to notice come from God as well.
What are the little things that you would like to thank God for? Here is a list of some gifts that come to mind:
~ a clean back porch - I looked out the other day and saw that some wonderful person had swept and cleaned the nastiness away.
~ friends to laugh and talk with - God has shown me how many wonderful
friends I have.
~ a side job for the weekend - earned a little spending money. :)
~ books - so much to read and so little time!
~ ruffles and flowers - I love the 'girly-ness' of clothes these days!
~ a dinner invitation tomorrow - complete with authentic Mexican food.
~ freedom and safety - watched an old movie last night about World War II. We are blessed.
I am grateful. I am daily loaded with so many blessings that I can't even remember them all. One specific thing from this last week, though. I was having one of those horrible, rotton days at work. Nearly everything that could go wrong did. However, it was that day that I happened to get a beautiful card from one of my dearest friends. Did God know that I would need the encouragement and love that day? Oh yes, I believe He did. And so Jess' card ended up in my work mailbox.
Father, for all these things and so many more...I am grateful.
So today, even though I am struggling with fear of the unknown, I pause to count blessings - to accept with joy the "God-moments" that have been given to me. I realize now that truly "every good and perfect gift come from above - from the Father of light with whom there is no variableness." This does not mean that only the big blessings come from God as gifts of grace. No, far from it. The little things that I often forget to notice come from God as well.
What are the little things that you would like to thank God for? Here is a list of some gifts that come to mind:
~ a clean back porch - I looked out the other day and saw that some wonderful person had swept and cleaned the nastiness away.
~ friends to laugh and talk with - God has shown me how many wonderful
friends I have.
~ a side job for the weekend - earned a little spending money. :)
~ books - so much to read and so little time!
~ ruffles and flowers - I love the 'girly-ness' of clothes these days!
~ a dinner invitation tomorrow - complete with authentic Mexican food.
~ freedom and safety - watched an old movie last night about World War II. We are blessed.
I am grateful. I am daily loaded with so many blessings that I can't even remember them all. One specific thing from this last week, though. I was having one of those horrible, rotton days at work. Nearly everything that could go wrong did. However, it was that day that I happened to get a beautiful card from one of my dearest friends. Did God know that I would need the encouragement and love that day? Oh yes, I believe He did. And so Jess' card ended up in my work mailbox.
Father, for all these things and so many more...I am grateful.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Trusting Jesus - that is all!
I have written on trust before. Slowly but surely I find myself learning that God is in charge. And this is a good thing. Those words used to strike fear in my heart. "God...in charge? But I don't know if His plans are good. I don't really think He even likes me." I would quote verses to myself about His plans to prosper me and to give me hope, but I couldn't get the knowledge down deep. It stayed on the very surface.
Today? I am still scared. But it is different. More just nervous, I think. I don't know how things are going to work out, but I trust the One Who is at work.
Simplistic? Perhaps it seems that way, but in reality there is a deep acceptance that must take place before one can truly trust Jesus. I think when we say we "trust Jesus" we are making a statement of surrender and commitment. We are accepting the grace He is offering and stepping forward in obedience. "I trust You" says to me that I accept Christ as Lord, that I don't have to know all the answers and that I believe that He will work in me...in my life...what is best.
I think the hardest thing may be remembering that what is best does not necessarily mean that which is easiest. And that is when fear starts knocking at the door again. That is (or should be) the time that I draw all the closer to Christ. I am learning about the perfect peace that passes all understanding...that peace is based on (and rests in) Christ alone. The peace is truly unexplainable. It is not ignoring things or burying my head in the sand. It is not found in denying reality. Neither is it superstition. It is leaning on God and letting Him draw me nearer to Him as I walk in the way He leads me.
I certainly don't know all the ins and outs about trust, and what I do know has been learned over the course of a very painful journey. I do know, though, that I long to continue on the path in which God is leading me. I have found this to be true: He is faithful and trustworthy - my life could not be in better hands.
The following quote is one of the most powerfully stated quotes on trust I have read. Enjoy!
"The way of trust is a movement into obscurity, into the undefined, into ambiguity, not into some predetermined, clearly delineated plan for the future. The next step discloses itself only out of a discernment of God acting in the desert of the present moment. The reality of naked trust is the life of the pilgrim who leaves what is nailed down, obvious, and secure, and walks into the unknown without any rational explanation to justify the decision or guarantee the future. Why? Because God has signaled the movement and offered it his presence and his promise." — Brennan Manning (Ruthless Trust: The Ragamuffin's Path to God)
Today? I am still scared. But it is different. More just nervous, I think. I don't know how things are going to work out, but I trust the One Who is at work.
Simplistic? Perhaps it seems that way, but in reality there is a deep acceptance that must take place before one can truly trust Jesus. I think when we say we "trust Jesus" we are making a statement of surrender and commitment. We are accepting the grace He is offering and stepping forward in obedience. "I trust You" says to me that I accept Christ as Lord, that I don't have to know all the answers and that I believe that He will work in me...in my life...what is best.
I think the hardest thing may be remembering that what is best does not necessarily mean that which is easiest. And that is when fear starts knocking at the door again. That is (or should be) the time that I draw all the closer to Christ. I am learning about the perfect peace that passes all understanding...that peace is based on (and rests in) Christ alone. The peace is truly unexplainable. It is not ignoring things or burying my head in the sand. It is not found in denying reality. Neither is it superstition. It is leaning on God and letting Him draw me nearer to Him as I walk in the way He leads me.
I certainly don't know all the ins and outs about trust, and what I do know has been learned over the course of a very painful journey. I do know, though, that I long to continue on the path in which God is leading me. I have found this to be true: He is faithful and trustworthy - my life could not be in better hands.
The following quote is one of the most powerfully stated quotes on trust I have read. Enjoy!
"The way of trust is a movement into obscurity, into the undefined, into ambiguity, not into some predetermined, clearly delineated plan for the future. The next step discloses itself only out of a discernment of God acting in the desert of the present moment. The reality of naked trust is the life of the pilgrim who leaves what is nailed down, obvious, and secure, and walks into the unknown without any rational explanation to justify the decision or guarantee the future. Why? Because God has signaled the movement and offered it his presence and his promise." — Brennan Manning (Ruthless Trust: The Ragamuffin's Path to God)
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Caution...Changes ahead!
Life has been so busy of late! It seems like I am never entirely caught up on things. I feel like I run from one thing to the next. It really is a good thing, though. I would rather be busy than bored, I think (at least as a general rule). :) Lately it seems like I run from work to homework to school to play to church and then try to catch a little sleep somewhere in the middle. Life is good, just crazy.
*laughing* I know that some would say that working for only 20 hours a week is not much. But when you also attend school, are involved with a ministry on Sunday...well, things start piling up.
There are several changes heading my way that still take my breath away when I stop and think about them. I can't quite announce them yet, but...wow! That's all I know to say. If I could have seen a year and a half ago where my life would be now...who'd a thunk it?!
I honestly believe that this season of my life has been one of the periods of greatest growth. The questions and pain that I have experienced during this time have been great. I never realized that life held so many dark times and struggles. On the other hand, I never knew that such pain and uncertainty could bring such growth and therefore such peace and joy.
Today I experienced an answer to prayer that is very large in nature. My school bill - all $1700 that was left to pay before the end of the school year - is covered. All that is left is about $28. I think I can handle that. :) There is no word for the wonder I feel except for this one...God. He knows how to care for His children. So I leave my life in His hands. There is no better place to be. He is showing me that I really can and should trust Him. I must never determine His guidance by whether I think I can afford to follow Him. I now know that if He leads me somewhere, He will provide for me there.
*laughing* I know that some would say that working for only 20 hours a week is not much. But when you also attend school, are involved with a ministry on Sunday...well, things start piling up.
There are several changes heading my way that still take my breath away when I stop and think about them. I can't quite announce them yet, but...wow! That's all I know to say. If I could have seen a year and a half ago where my life would be now...who'd a thunk it?!
I honestly believe that this season of my life has been one of the periods of greatest growth. The questions and pain that I have experienced during this time have been great. I never realized that life held so many dark times and struggles. On the other hand, I never knew that such pain and uncertainty could bring such growth and therefore such peace and joy.
Today I experienced an answer to prayer that is very large in nature. My school bill - all $1700 that was left to pay before the end of the school year - is covered. All that is left is about $28. I think I can handle that. :) There is no word for the wonder I feel except for this one...God. He knows how to care for His children. So I leave my life in His hands. There is no better place to be. He is showing me that I really can and should trust Him. I must never determine His guidance by whether I think I can afford to follow Him. I now know that if He leads me somewhere, He will provide for me there.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Forgetting and Remembering
Yesterday I heard a sermon that made me think. The speaker was talking about Mary and Joseph and how they accidentally left Jesus behind when they left Jerusalem after the Passover. It was not because of sin and it was not done on purpose. They just forgot to make sure he was with them. They forgot and later realized that Jesus had been left behind.
I have been thinking since then about how this has been a reality in my life. I get busy. I get stressed. I am tired. And so I forget to remember Him. I don't spend as much time caring for my relationship with Him. I stop spending extra time in prayer.
I don't know why I do this. I always suffer. It always brings extra worry and a spirit of lack to my spiritual walk. Why is this so easy to do?
So today I am remembering. Today I am spending some time alone...with Him. I am pondering His mercies and thanking Him for His love. In the quiet He speaks; it is necessary to leave the noise.
"Here I am, Lord. Please forgive my busy distraction. I seek to refocus my heart on You. Let me remember...and press forward. Let me see Your face."
I have been thinking since then about how this has been a reality in my life. I get busy. I get stressed. I am tired. And so I forget to remember Him. I don't spend as much time caring for my relationship with Him. I stop spending extra time in prayer.
I don't know why I do this. I always suffer. It always brings extra worry and a spirit of lack to my spiritual walk. Why is this so easy to do?
So today I am remembering. Today I am spending some time alone...with Him. I am pondering His mercies and thanking Him for His love. In the quiet He speaks; it is necessary to leave the noise.
"Here I am, Lord. Please forgive my busy distraction. I seek to refocus my heart on You. Let me remember...and press forward. Let me see Your face."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)